You Don't Have to Be Good at It to Show Up

I'm going to be honest with you. I'm bad at basketball. I'm bad at soccer too.

I play both anyway.

My friends give me a hard time about it. I never played organized sports growing up, and they let me hear about it. Blah blah blah. My answer is always the same. It doesn't matter if I played growing up. I love to play.

The thing that keeps guys home

A lot of guys never join the pickup game, the gym class, or the league because they think they have to be good first. They don't want to be the worst one there. They don't want to get clowned.

So they stay home. And home has nobody in it.

Most guys at a pickup game care a lot less about how good you are than you think. They care if you show up, play hard, and can take a joke.

Getting teased means you're in

When my friends tease me, I know I'm in. Guys do that with people they're comfortable with. You don't clown a stranger. You clown your boy.

So if some jokes come your way, take them. Laugh. Throw one back if you've got one.

Being bad gives you something to talk about

When you're new at something, you've got an easy opener. "How do you get the ball to curve like that?" "What am I doing wrong on my shot?" Guys love explaining the thing they're good at. You're giving them a reason to talk to you.

Your move

Find one thing you'd enjoy even if you're bad at it. Pickup basketball, soccer, a gym class, whatever. Go this week. Be bad at it out loud. Then go back next week.

You get better at the sport by playing. Friendships work the same way.